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Baby Anderson #2

If you're here, you've probably heard that we are having another baby!!! We are so incredibly excited!

BUT we also have to prepare ourselves, for the worst. I'm really writing this post because I'm finding myself explaining our circumstances more and more frequently, and it's kind of hard to talk about. I also feel horrible that nearly every one of my conversations about this pregnancy goes so... deeply. When I'm sure that's not at all what the initiator of the conversation was expecting. I almost feel like I need to ask for forgiveness when we talk about my pregnancy, especially if I'm not outwardly glowing, or beaming. Please know, inwardly, and in my heart, I long for this to be as easy and as happy as with Chloe, and I am happy to even have the opportunity to carry another child at all. It's just such an odd feeling, being happy in the moment, but also having anxiety about all the scary unknowns the future may hold for us. Feeling guilty about not letting myself get too attached "just in case." Let me explain.

After two experiences with hemorrhage I was unsure for quite a while if we would ever even try to have another baby. All I had ever wanted was to be a mom, and I am, to Chloe. Almost dying really makes you appreciate living. However, I struggled to find peace with only having one, when I had always dreamed (and expected) to have a large family (4+ children). Jeremy suggested that, "I think we'll always regret not trying to have another." So with that, we decided to try. Despite my worries and fears, I would always want another child. Things happened very quickly this time around - maybe so I didn't have time to change my mind.

A day after our first doctor's visit we received a call back about abnormal blood tests. Because of some high antibody numbers in my blood, Jeremy would need to be tested for the antigens. Low and behold, Jeremy is a carrier of an antigen that I happen to have the antibodies for (most likely from one of the transfusions I received after having Chloe). There isn't a current treatment, for this Rh incompatibility, and the effects range widely from no issues or complications to stillborn. Unfortunately, it's all just a waiting game, and baby's condition and health could change very quickly.

Overall, I'm feeling extremely well cared for, am comfortable with my OB and our Perinatologist, and confident that my concerns are heard and taken seriously (I may or may not have grilled them on their procedures and standard practices armed with loads of research on maternal hemorrhage). Due to the incompatibility, I have extra appointments that include ultrasounds for monitoring the baby and its condition at each one.

I'm sharing because this is all very emotionally taxing, and I figure if I get it out there, then maybe I won't have to explain this part so much. Prayers, good vibes, uplifting songs, articles, etc. are ALL appreciated.

Thank you so much for your love, patience, and understanding during this time.

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